"Love Is Not a Brick"

Finally, all of you should be of one mind. Sympathize with each other. Love each other as brothers and sisters. Be tenderhearted, and keep a humble attitude. Don't repay evil for evil. Don't retaliate with insults when people insult you. Instead, pay them back with a blessing. That is what God has called you to do, and he will bless you for it (1 Peter 3:8-9).

Love is not a brick. It is not about being first, proving others wrong, and demanding primacy - or else! It is not about violence initiated or retaliation for violence suffered. It is, at least in Christian teaching, about patience, kindness, and restraint. While love rejoices in truth and celebrates what is holy, it does not impose its view of truth by force or coerce what it regards as holy on others.

Back now to the question about going through the door first or eating the veggie burger. What would happen in those scenarios? My honest best guess is that each would insist on deferring to the other! "Please, go inside and get warm." "Please, take the food; I insist." Or, perhaps even better: "We can share this."

I see you — whoever you are — as one of God's wonderful creatures in whom he has invested himself, for whom he has extended himself over time, and for whom he died. You do not have to dress like me, speak my language, or share my beliefs. Not only will I not hate you, but I want to know and understand you.
Respect for others is neither apostasy nor compromise. It is love.

"But to you who are willing to listen, I say, love your enemies! Do good to those who hate you. Bless those who curse you. Pray for those who hurt you. If someone slaps you on one cheek, offer the other cheek also. If someone demands your coat, offer your shirt also. Give to anyone who asks; and when things are taken away from you, don't try to get them back. Do to others as you would like them to do to you. "If you love only those who love you, why should you get credit for that? Even sinners love those who love them! And if you do good only to those who do good to you, why should you get credit? Even sinners do that much!" (Luke 6:27-32).